Back By Popular DEMAND !!!

DISCLAIMER : It has recently come to my attention through both phone calls and random blog comments that some people think the incredible success of Heff's Bar And Grill is based strictly upon the feature of big-breasted women. I find these remarks EXTREMELY HURTFUL, as I feel I'm a provider of great material, with an "A list" blog here, folks. To disprove this complete and utter bullshit....

EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY, HEFF'S BAR AND GRILL WILL MAKE A CONSCIOUS EFFORT TO NO LONGER FEATURE BIG BREASTED WOMEN IN ANY FORM OR FASHION.

Sexual innuendo will also cease, as it's distasteful and quite often degrading to women.

If Heff has EVER offended anyone, I sincerely apologize from the bottom of my heart.

That being stated, enjoy your time at the "New and Improved" Heff's Bar And Grill, and...ON WITH THE SHOW !

You've tasted my BALLS... now put Heff's SHRIMP to your lips !

Heff & Donna take on HOOTERS Buffalo Shrimp, and Red Lobster's Cheddar Bay Biscuits !!!

First of all, make sure the Chef is WELL EQUIPPED for the task at hand...ABSOLUTELY ! (We actually created the Hooter's sauce pretty much from scratch. The jar of wing sauce just looked cool in the photo, lol.)

Purchase FRESH SHRIMP. Donna prefers the largest meat possible for the job. Sadly, Heff could only provide MEDIUM sized shrimp at the time.

Next, shell the shrimp, and remove the poop-shoot ever so gently...

"Butterfly" the shrimp as shown :
Heff licks it raw !!! (a little seafood porn for ya !)

Dredge Heff's meat (yes!) in standard egg wash, then flour.

Deepfry until golden brown.
We chose NOT to break out the commercial grade deepfryer for such a small amout of meat :(

Create the HOOTERS sauce in a small sauce pan using 1/4 cup of butter, 1/4 cup of Louisiana Hot Sauce, Cayenne pepper, and a dash of fresh ground black pepper.

Boil it, folks - Heff's meat LIKES IT HOT !

Combine the shrimp and the hot sauce in a plastic container. Seal the lid, and SHAKE THE HELL OUT OF THE HOOTERS !

Now we're on to the Red Lobster Cheddar Bay Biscuits. Anyone that's ever eaten there KNOWS how awesome these biscuits are, and this recipe is DAMN AUTHENTIC ! Exactly where in the Hell IS "Cheddar Bay", anyway ?!?
Preheat your oven to 400 degrees. Combine 2 & 1/2 cups Bisquick baking mix, 4 tblspns COLD butter, 3/4 cup COLD whole milk, 1/4 teaspoon garlic powder, and a HALF A FUCKING POUND of grated extra-sharp cheddar cheese !

Form the biscuits into large balls (yep), and bake for 15 minutes or until golden brown.

Donna displays her lovely biscuits...

Brush the top of the lovely biscuits with a mixture of 2 tblspoons melted butter, 1/2 teaspn garlic powder, 1/4 teaspoon dried parsley flakes, and a pinch of salt. There's nothing better than big ol' shiney biscuits !

There you have it - Hooters Buffalo Shrimp - a Hot & Spicey dish, and Red Lobster's comforting Cheddar Bay Biscuits conquered by Heff & Donna ! Until Next Time,

This is Heff signing off for a clean, and very distinguished IRON HEFF AMERICA !!!!