Cat Affection Move: The Belly
What does it mean when a cat rolls over and offers us their belly?
It is a show of trust.
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However, it is not necessarily a good idea to pounce on that tempting belly and rub it as we would a dog’s. Because when a dog does it, it is a submissive gesture. They are going to submit.
When a cat does it, it is a trust gesture. Can they trust us to respond appropriately?
If this is a cat we do not know, we respond best by admiring the belly. We say nice things about the cat in a soft and sincere voice. We can give them the slow blinks of our eyes to communicate that we want to be friends. If the cat wishes contact, they will seek it.
If it is our cat, we can slowly reach for the belly to gauge how comfortable the cat is with this implied contact. If the cat lashes their tail, flattens their ears, or fixes their gaze on our hand, they are too excited, and are moving into prey mode. We should stop at this point, and continue our verbal interaction.
It takes a great deal of trust for a cat to let us caress their belly. Just as a beginning friendship proceeds in stages, belly showing is an opening gambit, not an end in itself. We might mention to a new friend some past trauma, but we would find it inappropriate for them to immediately launch into a blow-by-blow account of some terrible event of their own. It is too much, too soon. It rushes our comfort level.
Likewise, cats will start by displaying their belly, but this is not an invitation to grab at it. All our movements should be slow, and give us enough time to gauge the cat’s comfort level. At this point the cat should be comfortable with us touching their head, so that is a great way to show our respect.
The next intermediate move is to touch a cat’s front, or, as time goes on, rear, paw. If the cat touches back, that’s fine. If the cat tries to grab it, they are still not sure of our intentions, and we should withdraw our hand.
When we slowly reach for the belly and the cat stays relaxed, with half-closed eyes, open ears, and quiet tail, we can gently lay our hand on the belly. That’s all. The cat might grab our hand, and if they are too excited and show claws, we can say, “ow ow ow,” and gently disengage ourselves. Never yank our hand away; this is how people scratch themselves.
As we proceed in these easy stages, we will arrive at our destination; a cat who shows us their belly because they enjoy some gentle cuddling and soft petting that includes their whole body.
Cats have gotten the unfair reputation of treachery because of their belly behavior. People have told me the cat invites belly rubbing, and then attacks! From the cat’s point of view, they have extended their hand for a handshake, and gotten a full body hug with some outrageous fondling of their person.
No one likes that.
It’s simply miscommunication. People who treat cats the way they are used to treating dogs are always unpleasantly surprised when the cat reacts differently. They shouldn’t be surprised. Cats are different, as these same people would be the first to complain about.
So rejoice in the sight of our cat’s belly, and remember what the signal means; that the cat is beginning to trust us. The next move is ours.
Make it the right one for the moment.
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There’s more ways to understand our cat with The Way of Cats than the article you are reading now. See all of my posts on WHY CATS DO THAT.
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