Domestic Violence Truths

by Kendall Segel-Evans originally published: ENDING MEN'S VIOLENCE NEWSLETTER, Fall, 1989 I recently read the National Organization for Changing Men's statement on child custody, and the position taken that, in general, sole custody by the previously most involved parent is preferable to joint custody. I would like to elaborate on this position for families where there has been violence between parents (i.e. woman-abuse). The following includes the main points of a deposition I was asked to provide to a lawyer for the mother in a child custody case. I do not believe this is the last or best word on the subject, but I ... Read Full Story

Projection , blame-shifting and minimizing , whitewashing or outright denying the abuse. These are three of what I consider to be the WORST OFFENSES an abusive personality or abusive group can do to someone. And a culture of denial literally rips the very soul and spirit of the person from them at its root. Here's some explanation (excerpts): Projecting blame. Abusers often engage in an insidious type of manipulation that involves blaming the victim for their behavior. Such perpetrators may accuse the victim of "pushing buttons" or "provoking" the abuse. By diverting attention to the victim's actions ("they went into it with eyes wide ... Read Full Story

There's a silence surroundiing me I can't seem to think straight I'll sit in the corner No one can bother me I think I should speak now (why won't you talk to me) I can't seem to speak now (you never talk to me) My words won't come out right (what are you thinking) I feel like I'm drowning (What are you feeling) I'm feeling weak now (why won't you talk to me) But I can't show my weakness (you never talk to me I sometimes wonder (what are you thinking) Where do we go from here (what are you feeling) "Keep Talking" PINK ... Read Full Story

Many of the same qualities valued in on-duty police officers can make those same officers dangerous perpetrators of domestic violence. All abusers employ similar methods to control and abuse their intimate partners. Officers however, have an arsenal of skills and tactics not commonly possessed by civilians. Professional training in the use of force and weapons, intimidation, interrogation and surveillance techniques along with the cultural climate coalesce into a dangerous and potentially lethal combination in a domestic situation. Victims face the bias of law enforcement agencies and the legal system, psychological intimidation, and high risk of lethality. This article examines the dynamics of police-perpetrated domestic ... Read Full Story

Log in to: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/allabouthim/2009/05/21/All-About-Him- Click on the arrow on the widget above and turn up your computer's speakers! Lisa's site and support board is http://www.vainencounters.com Narcissus - Alanis Morissette Read Full Story