Big Brother Housemates: First Impressions

I guess we can't just ignore it. Love it or hate it UK's Big Brother is back, It all kicked off last night.

Presenter Davina McCall started with the message, 'Release the Freaks.' Let's hope she's including herself in this category. She's now turned into a gurning parody of herself, time for her to be pensioned off.

Okay, there are 16 hopefuls. What's this thing though about some of their religions? A Christian we are told, a Catholic, a Muslim, a Buddhist. So what?

Here's a few first impressions on the line up.

Big Brother 2008 Line Up
as they appeared.

Mario Marconi and Lisa Appleton
We have barrel chested Mario, 42, (think Rocky) together with the artificially inflated chest of Lisa, 40. They are a couple who obviously are in the last chance saloon. He's had 200 lovers she's been on TV in Body Heat. Bookmakers favourites to be evicted first.

Luke Marsden
Doesn't swear, doesn't drink wears a suit to empower himself (therefore lacks confidence?) Wimp, 20, comes to mind.

Stephanie McMichael
The girl who got the publicity before the start because of a supposed leak. Desperate to become a celebrity and/or famous. She was kicked out of Popstars: The Rivals because she was just 13, now she's all grown up at 19.

Rachel Rice
Beauty Queen, well there had to be one. She's a trainee teacher, age 24, and has been in 22 commercials. Oh and she's a Catholic, a very talkative one at that.

Dale Howard
The good looking one for the girls, He reckons he's a 10 out of 10 and loves fit girls - what a surprise. Could be a possible winner. Age 21.

Sylvia Barrie
Supposedly a devout Christian, 21, originally from Sierra Leone. Attractive, another one who could be a favourite.

Dennis McHugh
Immediately thought: Perez Hilton! A flamboyant dancer, let's hope there are lots of mirrors in the house for him. He's 21

Michael Hughes
Likes to be called Mikey, 33. He's the blind contestant who was leaked to the press beforehand. Seems he likes to to do stand up comedy wearing women's clothes. Laugh? Let's hope he is, as so far doesn't appear very interesting.

Alexandra De-Gale
She's the Islam convert. Not sure why this is important but it keeps on being stressed. She gives herself 10 out of 10 for looks - yawn! Let's hope she dresses appropriately.

Rex Newmark
He's a well off chef and business man, 24, who loves food, who would have guessed. He's 24 a bit of a show off but is secretly shy.

Mohamed Mohamed
Born in Somalia, 23, with afro hair style. Otherwise didn't make much of an initial impression.

Rebecca Shiner
Vicky Pollard on speed. Artificially screams and giggles, desperate to be seen as fun. Could soon become very annoying as she likes to call herself 'The Bex'. Yuk!

Darnell Swallow
It seems it's important to mention he's an albino. So what? Claims never to have watched Big Brother before - yea, right. He's 26.

Jennifer Clark
Looks a bit like Cheryl Cole so the other girls might just hate her. She's 22, a part time model and is opinionated on: immigration, vegetarianism etc. etc. And what's more she's psychic so knows the BB winner already.

Kathreya Kasisopa
She's the Buddhist, age 30, originally from Thailand. She could go one of two ways: either be as irritating as hell or lots of fun. She does massage therapy and loves cookies - good qualifications for BB.

That's it.

There is a Secret Task. Mario and Stephanie have to pretend to be a couple. Obviously Lisa is in on and this and so is Luke. And what's more BB will make the made up couple wed on Sunday.

If the four convince the others then they won't be up for the first eviction. If the others work out the secret - and Mario and Steph aren't a very convincing couple - then the four will be up for eviction by themselves. Actually this could be interesting if things kick off properly.