How To Get Your Ex Back Info

Relationship Advice – Know Thyself

By Katherine on | From howtogetyourexbackinfo.com

I don’t know why, but a lot, and I mean a lot of people come to me for relationship advice. They’ve just divorced or have gone through a break up or they are thinking about breaking up with someone.

One thing that I notice is that these things occur when friends and family are having identity problems. They just can’t quite put a finger on the problem, but they’re just not happy. This is advice that I freely give to anyone that seems to be struggling with themselves. There are times in your life that make you look up and say to yourself “What happened?” Why am I not where I thought I would be at this time in my life. Where is that perfect partner and those 2.5 kids and my dog? Where is my dream job?

The relationship advice I want you to consider is this. Take a deep look at yourself. Have you held true to your own nature? Do you even know who you are? Have you always conducted yourself in a manner that was best for you and everyone else concerned or did you give in to pressure and persuasion even though you knew it was not in your best interest? It’s easy just to go with the flow, but is it best? If you keep finding yourself in situations that are not suited for you, ask yourself why. The only way that you can expect to add value to anyone else’s life is if you know who you are. Did you choose your career for the money or do you enjoy it? Did you marry your high school sweetheart or did you hold out for your soulmate? Do you drive a BMW when, deep down, you REALLY want a Chevy truck, but you’re afraid your friends just won’t understand? So many choices.

I have had friends discuss their relationships and one of the most common threads is the one that goes “If I could only get (insert significant others name) to change (insert really stupid thing), then everything would be perfect.” I will tell you my stock answer for this one. “Who the HECK do you think you are?” What gives one person the right to try and change another persons behavior? How would you feel if the shoe was on the other foot? How shocked would you be if (insert significant others name) suggested that you change (insert really stupid thing) so that things between you would be perfect? I am willing to bet that you would be more than a little insulted.

One thing to consider is that when you are dating, everybody is normally on their best behavior. So, why in the world do you think that those annoying things that you dislike about your significant other when your relationship is new are going to improve with time? Think about this seriously. If they don’t suit you to begin with, you have no right to try and change them. Do both of you a favor and move on.

One of my favorite lines from a movie, and I can’t even remember the name of it, was a woman sitting in the back of a limo with her fiance and she turns to him and says “Can you just not breathe?” I am no expert, but I would say that that relationship was over. Yeah, it can happen. You’re so busy that sometimes you don’t even notice it. When, exactly, did you become aware of the fact that you hate the way he brushes his teeth?

Go ahead and laugh, but it can be something as simple as that to open your eyes to the fact that you may want to examine your relationship. If something simple irritates you, there are usually underlying factors. And dental hygene is probably not one of them.

You can open up a discussion with your partner to find out what’s really bothering you or you may determine that you need some space to think things over. If you put a little distance between you and your partner, you may be able to objectively evaluate where you stand. If you decide to use some of that time to come to grips with what you really want, you may surprise yourself. Be honest with yourself. Learn who you are and you will be much better equipped to be of use to the rest of the world.

This advice may sound a little selfish, but, in the long run, it has saved people a lot of heartbreak, anguish and hurt. Is it better to stay in a flawed relationship just for the sake of being in a relationship or is it better to back off, regroup and keep your sanity? Your relationship may stand the test and come out much better than it was before, but you won’t know until you decide if you are following your true nature.