Amber Heard, Shailene Woodley & Other Stars Partner With Funny or Die to Expose Trump's 'Alternative Constitution'
'Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion...or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press' unless you're working with the 'Alternative Constitution.'
In an exciting new partnership with Funny or Die, celebrities have exposed Donald Trump's "Alternative Constitution." Finally, we have an explanation as to how the former reality TV star is justifying the violation of multiple statements in the sacred document.
Who'd have thought?
"There's sure been a lot of hullabaloo going on with Trump's last executive order," Divergent actress Shailene Woodley opens.
"A lot of people, including me, had questions..." Justice League star Amber Heard follows earnestly.
"Why is Trump doing this?" Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D actress Chloe Bennet wonders.
"Is this even constitutional?" Dulé Hill asks.
And a blunt, "What in the f*ck?" is offered from Supergirl's Mehcad Brooks.
The video goes on to explain Trump's baffling choices: Historians, the stars claim, have confirmed the existence of another constitution the Republican and his morally colorful cabinet are clearly using as reference.
Heard goes on to list one example. While the original Constitution states that "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion," Trump's "Alternative Constitution" states as follows: "But if a handsome, brave, scared president makes an executive order that favors one religion over another, he shall only experience pure ecstasy."
Well, this explains everything.