No wonder women are on CRACK
Read this, and tell me what you think.
Ask Lynn: Advice on love
By Lynn Harris
Dear Lynn,
My boyfriend and I have been dating for a few months now. He is online a lot. I try not to bother him and respect his privacy just as I would anyone. However, he closes his open windows, especially his email, if I go near him when he is online. What does this mean? We just moved in with each other, and he says he trusts me. I don’t understand why he would act this way. I have this strange feeling, and it’s nagging at me and won’t go away. It’s like he’s conditioning me to be suspicious—and I hate it. Should I talk to him about this? If so, how would I go about it?
– Need Lots of Help
See full article here:
http://msn.match.com/msn/article.aspx?articleid=8974&TrackingID=516311&BannerID=544657&menuid=6>1=10787">Click here"
I read this article today 1/01/08, on the front page of MSN, and had to laugh. The most apparent thing for me is how petty this woman is. While we slept over night into the new year, 50 people were hacked, and burned to death in Kenya while attending church by a hateful mob. Twenty-eight people where blasted to death while mourning for a loved one at a funeral in Iraq. This woman (can I call her that?) wonders why her boyfriend gets annoyed and shuts his e- mails while she walks by. The answer came from a women, Lynn Harris. "Co-creator with Chris Kalb, of the award-winning website, BreakupGirl.net and author of the new comic novel Death By Chick Lit. A journalist and essayist, Lynn also writes about gender, dating, and culture high and low for Salon, glamour.com">Glamour, The New York Times, and others."
So here's what Lynn says this 'woman' should do:
Lynn: "How to bring it up? Don’t sneak up on him in the act. Instead, catch him at another time and say, “You know, I noticed — and I’m sure you’ve noticed that I’ve noticed — that you close windows on your computer if I happen to walk by. I’m really not looking over your shoulder. And I do believe that, especially now that we’ve moved in together, we need chances to have our own space—so I don’t want you to feel like you have to do that. And to tell you the truth, it kind of makes me feel a little uncomfortable. Can we talk about it for a sec?”
See what he says. If he’s open to a conversation, that’s good. Moving forward, without letting yourself become hyper-vigilant, you can just allow yourself to notice any other behavior that nags at you or strikes you as furtive."
The only thing that is going to strike this man, is that his girlfriend is on crack. This is the advice coming from someone who writes for Salon, Glamour, and The New York Times. And my daughters read it, (I have four daughters) on the front page of MSN. So this is the advice you give women? How about this-
Dear Need Lots of Help,
I am sorry to inform you that you do need lots of help. I understand this is the first time you ever moved in with him (or probably anyone else besides your parents). And since you have only been dating him for a few months, obviously you are still getting to know each other. There is something called ‘personal space’, or ‘time to focus’, or if someone interrupts you, you stop what you are doing and look at the person. A mature man would have this conversation with you, if need be. However, let’s reevaluate the need for the question in the first place. Ask your self, are you untrusting to begin with? Are you trust worthy yourself?
Next, you said, 'It’s like he’s conditioning me to be suspicious'. This was the most concerning statement of all. He cannot do anything to you. He does what he does, right? Then you decide how to react… if a reaction is necessary. You are conditioning yourself to be suspicious. Where is your sense of taking responsibility? This is the serious condition many, many 'women' seem to have. Blame other people for the way they feel. Creating, and making up things that are not even happening. It's backwards thinking. In this case, he's not suspicious. The woman is, and she is playing a victim. If there was responsibility present, accountability present, and also the ability to make requests and have powerful conversations present, that makes a difference and move actions forward...what would this world look like? What would relationships look like?
Do you think there would be less divorces? Less children torn between families? If women truly were responsible; how do you think we would be conditioning men? Take a wild guess. To be responsible. Yes ladies, the power is within us to say how the conversations go. Women give it away, over and over to men who do not understand what women are doing. This man above, was working on his computer (‘a lot’? what is a lot?...2 hrs? 12 hrs, it depends on the viewers experience of working on their own computer) and he is living with someone who is wondering why they covering up their emails, etc? Writing emails is like writing letters, pen and paper style…but on-line. Does anyone like someone looking over our shoulder at what we are writing? Get real.
This women needs to get busy. Go to work, get a hobby, or get a job. Now this man has to deal with a crack-head women, and now she asks a crack head question, which is more disturbing answered by a woman who gives advice to other women...who quite frankly was another crack head response. Further more, a generation of young women will read both women’s writing (good chance-since it's on the front of MSN), and determine..."oh, what is my man doing on the computer?" and possibly think, "oh, Lynn is a journalist and columnist, this is probably what I should do-she knows what she is talking about."
And the cycle continues. A generation of self absorbed, unrealistic, women who blame everyone for everything that they don’t like. They live with no sense of reality. Lying to themselves, they are only hurting themselves. They are conditioning the men in our lives that we are on crack….and condition them to be irresponsible like the majority of women are.
Let’s start 2008 on the right foot. How about a New Year’s resolution that goes like this: “My New Years resolution is to take responsibility for my actions, and stop blaming others for how I feel.” What a concept; women owning their own power. What a gift.
Bobbi Miller-Moro is a columnist for Immigrant Magazine, specializing in the empowerment of women and children. She is also an Award-winning artist, living in Los Angeles, Ca. Look for her hosting schedule this year of various shows and events on location highlighting eco-friendly products and supporters. She is the wife of Luis Moro, stand-up comic and actor. Her most proudest role is being the mother of five children. She is the niece of the great Hedda Hopper.
ThankGodForMommy.com
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