10/07/09 Patricia A. Hawkenson’s Reflections

This is a Test of the Emergency Broadcast System

WARNING:
DO NOT EAT CHOCOLATE PUDDING
at any social function
where cleanliness
is required!

While you squirm
unsuccessfully in her death grip,
your momma holds your chin
firmly by one hand
while licking the fingers
of her other hand.

You are rendered defenseless
against the Momma Slob
she slathers on your cheek,
her loving attempt
to spare you the embarrassment
of a chocolate smeared face.

You are mortified,
sweetly sticky,
wiping uselessly
with the back of your hand
in a futile effort
to salvage some dignity.

Roll your eyes
in disgust and disgrace,
but the humiliation
of Momma Slob
is a final exam
that can only be passed
when you are wise enough
to say, “No, thank you,”
when chocolate pudding is served.