Moog's Movie Reviews

Yet another shining example of why I won't win a Noble Peace Prize. At least in the Middle East. Here is an IM conversation I had the other day with my buddy John . Please, people - no Jihads. Thanks in advance. If you hate intolerance of other cultures, you might want to skip this. I think I failed that class. Probably because the teacher had a f*cking accent. ******************** (we were in the middle of talking about working out) midgetmanofsteel: so, I'm doing wrist curls with the olympic bar, kneeling over a bench (forearms on the bench, wrists over) midgetmanofsteel: ..and they're starting ... Read Full Story

Today, I'm reviewing another movie off my Netflix list: The Ruins This movie is aptly named because it RUINS your Saturday night. Since I don't actually feel like wasting much time on this piece of shit, let me sum it up here: 1) It's not scary 2) It's f*cking gross Seriously, when you find out what the 'monster' actually is, you're going to say to yourself: "Man..my toenails are getting long." Yeah..that was pretty much my reaction right after I exclaimed: "You're f*cking kidding me ." So, no - not scary. However, if you want to be completely grossed out in scene after scene, ... Read Full Story

It's another time for an exciting episode of "Dear Moog" ... Where the answers to your questions come almost as quickly as I do. Almost. Look out, ladies!! Yeah. I'm hot. ********************** Disclaimer: I am not responsible for any stupid sh*t you do to yourself or others as a result of taking any of my advice seriously. There, I think that covers it. You've been warned. *********************** Today's letter comes from Malach the Merciless : This question has been bothering me for a long time, and no seems to know the answer. When Dr. Bruce Banner gets all angry and Hulks up, his clothes ... Read Full Story

The toilet paper finale wasn’t bad at all. No, no... I'm not talking about my MASSIVE Bowel Movement after eating all of that Christmas food. ..which really was quite spectacular . I should have taken pictures. Again. But I digress... I'm talking a Blue Man Group post-mortem. Here we go... So…we went to see Blue Man Group on Sunday. It was – as usual – AWESOME . But, the day before we went – Saturday – I decided to go to the website and get some updated directions to the theater. "Oops...that's video porn... how did I pop on there? " (ten minutes and ... Read Full Story

Continuing yesterday's trend, I'm providing you with yet another story prior to my Christmas Break. Yesterday, it was rodent scat . Today, we'll be discussing face paint and toilet paper. Toilet Paper and Chipmunk poo in TWO (count 'em...TWO) unrelated stories. How cool is that? Story #2: Blue Man Group This weekend, we’ll be taking the family to see “The Blue Man Group.” If you’ve never seen Blue Man Group, or have any idea what I’m talking about…go to YouTube: ..or their site HERE . It’s really an experience. ...anyway... ...I'm not getting paid to do their Goddamn commercials...so let's get back to the ... Read Full Story