Napolean Dynamite Quotes

Kid on Bus: What are you gonna do today, Napoleon?
Napoleon Dynamite: Whatever I feel like I wanna do. Gosh!

---

Napoleon Dynamite: So, we're pretty much friends by now, right?
Pedro: Yes.
Napoleon Dynamite: So, you got my back and everything, right?
Pedro: What?

---

Napoleon Dynamite: You wanna play me?

---

Napoleon Dynamite: I spent like three hours doing shading the upper lip. It's probably the best drawing I've ever done.

---

Napoleon Dynamite: Grandma just called and said you're supposed to go home.
Uncle Rico: She didn't tell me anything.
Napoleon Dynamite: Too bad, she said she doesn't want you here when she gets back because you've been ruining everybody's lives and eating all our steak.
Uncle Rico: I'm not goin' anywhere, Napoleon.
Napoleon Dynamite: Get off my property!
Uncle Rico: It's a free country. I can do whatever I want.
Napoleon Dynamite: Get off my property or I'll call the cops on you.
Uncle Rico: Well then do it! Go on!
Napoleon Dynamite: Maybe I will, GOSH!

---

Napoleon Dynamite: Stay home and eat all the freakin' chips, Kip.
Kip: Napoleon, don't be jealous that I've been chatting online with babes all day. Besides, we both know that I'm training to be a cage fighter.
Napoleon Dynamite: Since when, Kip? You have the worst reflexes of all time.
Kip: Try and hit me, Napoleon.
Napoleon Dynamite: What?
Kip: I said come down here and see what happens if you try and hit me.

---

Rex: At Rex Kwan Do, we use the buddy system. No more flying solo. You need somebody watching your back at all times. Second off, you're gonna learn to discipline your image. You think I got where I am today because I dressed like Peter Pan over here?

---

Napoleon Dynamite: I told you! I spent it with my uncle in Alaska hunting wolverines!
Don: Did you shoot any?
Napoleon Dynamite: Yes, like 50 of 'em! They kept trying to attack my cousins, what the heck would you do in a situation like that?
Don: What kind of gun did you use?
Napoleon Dynamite: A freakin' 12-gauge, what do you think?

---

Napoleon Dynamite: You know, there's like a butt-load of gangs at this school. This one gang kept wanting me to join because I'm pretty good with a bo staff.

---

Napoleon Dynamite: Well, I have all your equipment in my locker. You should probably come get it cause I can't fit my numchucks in there anymore.

---

Napoleon Dynamite: Do the chickens have large talons?
Farmer: Do they have what?
Napoleon Dynamite: Large talons.
Farmer: I don't understand a word you just said.

---

Pedro: Do you think people will vote for me?
Napoleon Dynamite: Heck yes! I'd vote for you.
Pedro: Like what are my skills?
Napoleon Dynamite: Well, you have a sweet bike. And you're really good at hooking up with chicks. Plus you're like the only guy at school who has a mustache.

---

Napoleon Dynamite: Just tell them that their wildest dreams will come true if they vote for you.

---

Napoleon Dynamite: Napoleon Dynamite. I'm one of Pedro's best friends.

---

Deb: What are you drawing?
Napoleon Dynamite: A liger.
Deb: What's a liger?
Napoleon Dynamite: It's pretty much my favorite animal. It's like a lion and a tiger mixed... bred for its skills in magic.

---

Napoleon Dynamite: Tina, you fat lard, come get some DINNER!... Tina, eat. Food. Eat the FOOD!

---

Napoleon Dynamite: Yessssssssss.

---

Napoleon Dynamite: Because my uncle Rico's an IDIOT.

---

Napoleon Dynamite: My old girlfriend from Oklahoma was gonna fly out for the dance but she couldn't cause she's doing some modeling right now.

---

Principal Svadean: Look, Pedro, I don't know how they do things down in Juarez, but here in Idaho we have a little something called pride. Understand? Smashing in the face of a pinata that resembles Summer Wheatley is a disgrace to you, me, and the entire Gem State.