So it's been a while now and I think it's safe to say that things have pretty much gone right down the shitter. The economy is barely afloat, North Korea wants to make the world glow in the dark by finally kicking off that whole nuclear winter thing, and the swine flu A-porka-lypse has officially begun. Not to mention that EVERYBODY is frickin' dead...or gay. Either way, it's bad. Not the gay thing, but you get the picture. Never fear, though. You know the economy has to turn around soo... Read Full Story
So here's a little dingleberry that floated by me on the internets today; blogger Perez Hilton's celebrity schmelebrity blog scored 14 million views in a single day. To put this in perspective, every blog made in Wordpress combined only get about 20 million views per day in total. Now I can't bash Perez Hilton for making a bazillion dollars in a single day for writing about something that nobody should be interested in (in this case the breakup between uber hot Megan Fox and wha... Read Full Story
I'm sure most people know by now that former Blink 182 drummer Travis Barker and DJ AM were severely wounded in a plane crash earlier this week in which four people lost their lives. Normally, asshole that I am, I don't mind when people poke fun at tragic accidents. I think death is something that needs to be taken in stride and there really is no opportune time to cease living, so it's kind of counter intuitive to call one death a tragedy and another no big deal. I'm just ... Read Full Story
Okay, I've got another awesome video for all of you intestinal parasites out there. I know that most of you probably worship the turds in Batman's toilet bowl after seeing The Dark Knight, but I'm telling you, it's the Punisher's time to rule. It's gonna be a red Christmas, bitches, just you wait and see. Read Full Story
But I'm a poor bastard, and that's what counts. Hello loyal readers...both of you. I'm just posting to say sorry for not updating lately. I'm going to try to find something good in pop culture to crap on next week, so to speak. But until then I want everyone to know that I'm promoting a novel that I wrote. If anyone has been to my other websites you've probably seen it before and by now you're probably screaming, "Enough already, you pretentious shit head... Read Full Story
1. Lindsay Lohan's a lesbian2. Miley Cyrus3. New Kids on the Block reunion4. Miley Cyrus5. The Jonas Brothers6. Joan Rivers is still alive7. Did we cover Miley Cyrus yet?Okay, okay. Maybe I'm being a little pessimistic here. I mean, really, what on the list couldn't possibly be viewed as a good thing? I mean, Lindsay Lohan might be bumping fur now, but we can all still hope for a sex video scandal, right? Well, that might not be so great since I didn't even know about the ... Read Full Story
I have done shit, and that's about it. I've sat around all day thinking of ways to make something more out of life other than actually doing something. And, ya know, every few minutes there was the ugly feeling in my stomach telling me it was time to go rip some crimson. Ever had that type of gassy, bloody diarrhea that sprays out and leaves little specks in the bowl that can't be flushed off? Well, anyway, I think I'm getting off track. The point is, it seems like there&... Read Full Story
So, anybody who follows that big bastard we call the popular media probably knows that the writer's strike is over. Ya know, I'm not sure what makes me more sad, the fact that all of the TV shows had to go away, or the fact that they're actually coming back. That's not to say that most of today's shows are bad. It's to say that they're awful. Is it possible to be relatively kidding? Oh well, moving on. About the only smart move Hollywood makes these days is c... Read Full Story
Well I'm not sure how many people heard about this particularly painful piece of news, and I sure as hell hope there aren't any rabid 50 Cent fans in the audience, because it would make me even more ashamed to admit that...gulp...I'm just the tiniest bit jealous of the guy. We've all heard of the calorie packed psuedo-health drink Vitamin Water, right? Well, it seems that early in 2007, that old bullet-sponge Fiddy (as I've heard him called), signed on to be a spokesman ... Read Full Story
