Michelle Obama's Makeover. What a crock!

Michelle Obama needs a makeover. What a load of crock! Take a good look at the word, "makeover". What does it mean? Makeover to what else, or to who else? It is such a strange feeling to watch and hear all of the buzz the past couple of days. It is strange, because it is almost expected, yet it is shocking at the same time.

This is what I attempted to write about in my posts for women. It is a perfect real-life example. They say that Michelle needs a makeover. She needs to be softened. Why? So that she will be more likeable, more lovable and accepted. She needs to seal those lips. She must not have an opinion that tolls a harder line, or that is too different from her husband, lest the general public become concerned about who will be in charge in the White House. Are 'we the people' so afraid, quivering in our own skins that we dare not hear the opinions of highly educated and experienced people? I think not. Talk about having so little faith in "we the people"!

Well, I have had enough of this double-standard load of crock! My intelligence is insulted when listening to how an individual needs to be packaged, in order to be sold. For anyone reading from across the pond, do not be too quick to chuckle, because it happens in your countries as well.


This woman has qualities that we need to see more of, and it has everything to do with confidence and authenticity. They say that a makeover will allow us to get to know her better. I claim that we have gotten to know her. How much do we really need to know? Do we need to know her bra size as well?

Has Michelle Obama not shown throughout the entire political circus that she loves her children, and prioritizes her family? Has she not shown time and time again that she is a loyal and committed wife? Has she not stood by her husband's side and shown her warmth, thumbs-up, enthusiasm, engagement, and joy? Has she not attended some of the most competitive schools in the country, whereby proving her ability to commit, and work hard?

Ah, strong women. We can handle a little of it, but not too much. We use so many frilly words about what women should be, and we don't even know what they mean anymore. Created is a conflict where strength, competency, and intelligence stand in contrast to pretty, warm, sexy, and sweet. Many struggle to harness some qualities to benefit the expression of others. For some reason these qualities are deemed opposites, and not integrated parts of a whole. It is just plain ridiculous!

There are so many strange ideas about strength and confidence, and some seem to think that it must mean "overly independent", meaning that one no longer has the need to love or be loved, and that it means that warmth and sensuality get kicked to the curb.

Is Michelle any less warm, motherly, and feminine? Does she really need to be softened? I see a woman that appreciates the hugs of her husband. I see a woman that appreciated and was touched when her husband defended her by stating, "lay off my wife". I have observed so many things, and I am certainly not alone in that experience.

Which premises are at the foundation of our definitions? What in the heck are people talking about?

I choose to stuff that 'gibberish' in a turkey, and throw it to the alligators out back. Whew! I have wanted to yell that out for years, and now I have the alligators, and they look terribly hungry. I wrote about this concept of femininity in my book, and how we should be redefining, and running the path with the baton that was passed to us decades ago. We have not done it. Not quite. In hindsight, I see that I should have hit that point much more.

Each time I work with women, these issues are major roadblocks. It is difficult to work with that inner confidence to authentically be oneself, when they are afraid of the reactions they will receive from others. They fear that they will end up losing their relationships. They wish to be more themselves and feel happier, yet it may not always satisfy the frilly details of expected roles. It is not the roles in life that pose a problem. It is rather how we keep choosing to define many of the words I mentioned above.

So, gals! You all know where this Michelle Obama makeover can lead. This story is the story of many. It is also the story for many men out there. Instead of staying on the path of working towards living an authentic life, where mind, heart, and body are aligned, people go into periodic hiding. They hang out, and hide within themselves, and there is much that is not expressed.

This means that joy and happiness stay locked inside as well. Feelings of pure joy, where warmth and sensuality are the overflowing excess energies, have a place in our daily roles. However, they get traded out with the tension of hiding, energy levels sink, and resentment builds. People lose time, and they lose their lives. It becomes the path of one step forward, and two steps back. Those peak experiences flatten out to a solid line, and even though that joy would benefit their commitments and relationship activities together, much more.

We do not know who the Mrs. of the White House will be. Nor, do we have to agree with every opinion that is stated. However, I defend the right of people, men and women alike, to be their authentic and confident selves, so that all of the potential positives can benefit their lives, and their relationships.

One last note to the gals out there, and please do not be shocked by the bluntness, okay? As you develop all aspects of your inner self and feel good about the process, stay focused. You are going to run into these preconceived notions, and I know that you already have, many a time. Well, if anyone should wonder "what" you are, just pull down your pants, and show them which equipment you were born with. It's a show-stopper. If they respond with shock, just tell them to talk to Tami about it. Sorry, I couldn't help myself. I had to write it, so let that be the "quick-fix" tip of the week.



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Tamera Daun© www.pentad.no