I am in California now for a Bar and Grill Mitzvah. A mile of the highway leading to Oakland where the Bar Mitzvah is is adopted by Black Wing Tattoo and Piercing. The party is held in O'Connell Dodge, the former showroom of a Dodge dealership. Something weird about a Bar Mitzvah in a defunct autodealer. I sneak around to the back. There is a door with a sign on it that reads "Employee Pool and Sauna." Now there are no more employees. Read Full Story

A wise and witty friend sent me this quotation from a fella called Stephin Tobin. Makes sense to me."Business people are like bricks.Creative people are like wine glasses. When the brick and the wine glass collide, the brick always wins. But remember this; you can’t drink wine out of a brick."Billy Wilder had something like this as well.He defined an associate producer as the only personwho would associate with a producer.(He was talking about movie producers, who are often money men.Not agen... Read Full Story

For the past few years the shibboleth of the pundits and pontificators has been "story-telling." Every time I hear the word I cringe because I always wonder how many of the people who use it have ever actually read a story.Last night, I picked up a new translation of one of the oldest stories of all. Peter Akcroyd's superb prose translation of Chaucer's "The Canterbury Tales." I haven't read Chaucer since college--I'll admit, he was always my favorite, way moreso than Shakespeare, who everyon... Read Full Story

I just came across this headline in The New York Times: "Gene D. Cohen, Geriatric Psychiatrist, Dies at 65". My first reaction when I saw this was that it was unfair to call a man who is 65 a geriatric. Then I realized that Cohen was a psychiatrist for geriatrics not a geriatric psychiatrist. I'm no grammarian but I think the headline should have called him a "Geriatric-Psychiatrist." Read Full Story

For years we unannointed have assumed that the initials MBA stand for Master’s of Business Administration. The more I see the state of business today, the more I contend MBA really stands for Master’s of Bullshit Administration.Yesterday evening on my way home from work I decided I needed a new pair of jeans, so I headed over to the Gap. To me the Gap seems under the dangerous influence of MBAs. It is all about retail best practices and not at all about the customer.The Mens' department in my... Read Full Story

Last weekend, uncharacteristically, I watched a bit of football. While watching it occurred to me if we covered either of the two wars we are fight as well as we covered sports, public sentiment would be aware we are fighting them and would be aware of their horror and would likely be against those wars. Likewise, if any of the 35,000 maimed American boys received anything like the coverage we are getting out of Fort Hood, there would be outrage about "Mission Accomplished" and the dupeficati... Read Full Story

In a window looking out on the smallest street in Manhattan, Weehawken St. Read Full Story

A couple of weeks ago the spot posted above made the rounds on the masturbatory advertising "creativity" sites. It's creative. It's beautiful. It's epic.It's also phony.Last night, while the TV was on, I saw the "for public consumption" version of this commercial. Horror of horrors, it had copy, supers, a demo. It was commerce not art.Take a look at the real spot below:Fake. Real.Boys and girls, as much as I'm loathe to admit it, commerce is what we do. Seriously, how much do you need to thin... Read Full Story

In our corporate state, you can divide the world into two parts. Lovers and Ledgers. The lovers are usually people who start businesses.They and their success are driven by passion.By doing something that makes them famous.By doing things they love.Sooner or later, the lovers sell out to the ledgers.Ledgers are people who try to build a process around a lover's passion.They watch timesheets to make sure the passion-people don't go overboard.They make sure there is optimal profit.They count ev... Read Full Story

I do not wish to stop and stareWhile you display your underwear.OK Uncles? OK Aunties?I have no wish to see your panties.Please get a belt, and hike your slacks,Your cosmology, discretion lacks.And do not let it come to pass,That your jeans fall down below your ass.Put away your breasts. This ain't the beach,Keep them safe and out of reach.You have two choices when it comes to skin,Let it out or keep it in.It would make me happy and so much gladder,If you would kindly choose the latter. Read Full Story