raymwiii

Its been quiet in my world lately.  My wife is nearing the end of her pregnancy and she is tired, sore, and often times napping.  I have found myself thinking that it would be nice to have a close friend to keep me company during a few recent evenings.  I am not completely friendless, but previous weeks have led me to think about the people I’ve known and called friends in the past. My wife and sister have amazed me with their ability to keep in touch with people.  They both communicate... Read Full Story

A few days ago I accompanied my wife to a doctor’s appointment to check up on our soon to be born twin girls.  While we were waiting to check out I took the chance to weigh myself on an unattended nearby scale since I’m too heavy for conventional bathroom scales.  I was quite dismayed at the result which is also the title of this post.  Being that it also came more than 40 days since I quit eating sugar and began exercising regulary it is quite concievable that I would have tipped the scales... Read Full Story

It is my birthday today for another half an hour anyway.  Not according to WordPress however since they always cut my days short, but I guess it isn’t all that important.  I did some birthday shopping over the weekend and found out or became reminded of the fact that anything worth having is more expensive than can be afforded even in celebration of my birthday.  This being the case I bought a couple of new tires for my car which seemed practical enough but not exciting. Throughout the... Read Full Story

I used to live to eat.  My diet was based on what tasted best to me.  The only problem is that my taste buds had been hijacked by sweets and other less than nutritious dishes that are now difficult for to classify as “food”.  I am not a picky eater and like many vegetables, fruit, lean protein, and other healthy options but none of it ever appealed to me when I was hooked on pizza, fast food, and sweets. I know now that eating refined sugar, white flour, and other refined foods actually... Read Full Story

Yesterday I found out that one of the guys in my chewing tobacco quit group relapsed after 230 plus days nicotine free.  Aside from being hurt that he broke his commitment and threw everything away, I was also reminded of the tall order we face as addicts.  There is no cure for our disease and the best we can do is a daily reprieve. The saddest thing is once your clear of the physical withdrawal and have learned how to live life without a substance, the decision to go back is 100 percent... Read Full Story

We’ve reached the final day of July.  Perhaps the best July possible.  A sugar free July.  Improbable but not impossible.  In the midst of funerals, holidays, and birthdays.  Among friends, family, and strangers.  With a lot of support and encouragement as well as some misunderstanding discouragement.  I am proud to have shared this first sugarless month with you all.  I feel wonderful and my health is rapidly improving daily.  See you in August. Read Full Story

I’ve recently spent a lot of time reflecting on all the pain I’ve swept under the rug over the years.  Lately I seem to be able to vividly recall all the disappointment, failure, rejection, and the range of emotions that accompany such things which are such a vital part of who I am today.  The dreams I never saw through, the girls who never loved me back, the friendships I gave up on, and numerous return trips to square one. Many of these memories seem more clear and meaningful to me now... Read Full Story

I took my wife to Outback for dinner Sunday night and ordered a 14 oz. New York strip steak with a loaded baked potato on the side.  I probably overdid things slightly since I left completely stuffed and thats okay.  I was able to treat myself to a special meal out that didn’t have the least bit of refined sugar or white flour.  By the way it is almost midnight and I’m still satisfied from dinner and not in the least bit hungry. When we used to go out I would inevitably end up getting the... Read Full Story

The downfall of many an addict boils down to one critical moment.  This moment simply occurs when we convince ourselves that we can have just one.  One drink, one cigarette, one hit, or for the purposes of this particular blog, one delicious sugar filled treat. Twelve step programs are adamant about the first step being the only one that has to be practiced to perfection every second of every day.  The first step says “We admitted we were powerless over (insert drug of choice here) and that... Read Full Story

Whose afraid of the big bad crave?  If you’ve ever started a diet and white knuckled your way into the afternoon only to give in to your dessert of choice, you know that cravings can be a bitch.  They have choked the life out of my best intentions to get myself healthy on countless occasions.  Eventually a person naturally gets beat down from all that failure and gives up.  Who wants to live a life wrapped in that painful self denial anyway? Fortunately I’ve come to understand a thing or... Read Full Story