To my two-legged friends. I must sincerely apologise for me absence of late. It is far from acceptable and I shall endeavour to be more regular with my posting.But I do have a good excuse. Mum has been really busy lately with writing essays and other boring human stuff so I haven't been able to get to the computer that often. The only time she's really off it is when she's taking me for a walk- and I obviously can't use it then.Anyway, my main reason for writing this little bl... Read Full Story

Hey there everybody. I thought that by now you were probably getting bored of the one picture of me at Sherwood Forest... and it's been a while since I posted, so I thought I would show you what I have been up to in my absence. Please comment and I hope you enjoy them! Read Full Story

I have always found the most enjoyable part of any day to be my morning and afternoon walks. I especially love it when we get to the park and mum lets me off the lead so I can go and have a good tinkle or sniff some bitch's bum. The part of walks that I have always found a little bit boring is the walk on the pavement bit on the way to and from the park- all that incessant 'Heel boy,' 'Close boy,' 'Rowdy, no, don't chase that squirrel into the road,'  brings me... Read Full Story

I have never been so embarrassed in my life- and that is no small order given the recent removal of my testicles and the public gayfest that I suspect has my castration at least partly to blame.My mother (if that is her real name) seems to have this obsession at the moment with talking about my excrement. Sometimes with complete strangers! I have come to learn that the reason for the introduction of organic rabbit and brown rice (aka really really boring) food is because I have a 'sensiti... Read Full Story

It has been exactly one week to the day since that fateful visit to the vet. Since then, I have not been allowed off of the lead, my mum has changed my food to some organic shit and the gravy bones that I loved so much have been swapped for (but will never be replaced by) oat and peanut biscuits!I had almost come to terms with losing my most valuable and impressive assets, that stupid cone thing they put on my head that seemed to make every corner an automatic challenge went within a couple o... Read Full Story

Lost my tennis ball in the park today, but fear that that particular ball is the least of my worries. She has said it so many times and not followed through with it that I just assumed that she was joking.I thought we had an understanding, but she has tried to justify herself by saying something about barking at one or two things like bikes, men without dogs, men that smell of booze, men in general and anything that walks passed the house. She even had the gall to tell me it was for my own go... Read Full Story

I met this well sexy bitch yesterday. She was possibly a little bit young for me, but I'm not after anything long term and I could tell that she wanted me.Her name was Daisy and she was a little Dalmatian and she was gorgeous. The main problem is that she has a bit of an overprotective father. All I did was try to hump her a little bit, but we should possibly have waited until we were alone and somewhere a little more private. Her dad wasn't very happy- something about 'taking his... Read Full Story

If there's one thing I don't like, it's bikes. Well, I don't like men who smell of alcohol. So if there's two things I don't like, it's bikes and cider soaked men. Well, I don't really like people walking passed the house either. Ok, so if there are three things that I don't like, it's bikes, drunks and passing pedestrians. But I really don't like bikes.It's great though because all I have to do to get them to go away is run after them barking. ... Read Full Story

But is it Tina's Baby? She made an agreement with Jackie (or is it Jacqui) that she would have the baby for her and Tony because they could not have children. But... it is the right of any mother to opt out at any time even if the baby has already been born- that doesn't include changing your mind three years later and wanting to take the toddler back, of course.And now, Tina can't have kids herself... because she was doing this for Jackie/Jacqui. I think I'd be changing my mi... Read Full Story

We finally moved in last week. I have been staying with my friends, Lottie, Takara and Eddie for a while and it has been great, but I was glad to get back to my mummy and she has been spoiling me rotten. I have had chewy sticks in all the flavours that you could ever imagine- that's right, chicken... and beef!I don't know why she expects me to sleep on my own bed though. Mum's is a king size and it is definitely big enough for the both of us- I'm only little after all. She say... Read Full Story