A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. “Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?” The blonde said, “How about 50 dollars?” The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man’s wife, inside the house, heard t... Read Full Story

I was taken to a lovely restaurant for my birthday.  I cannot divulge where it was or indeed who the chef was but it was one I have wanted to go to for quite a while. I had the taster menu.  Only 7 courses.  ‘Oh you greedy mare!’ you cry.  Nooooo. These things, these courses are delicate, intricate little creatures – works of art in fact.  You only get a little morsel and then you are done.  I like it like that though. It means I can try lots of tastes.  Fantastic. So, what ... Read Full Story

Top 10 Reasons Why Trick-or-Treating Is Better Than Sex 10. You’re guaranteed to get at least a little something in the sack. 9. If you get tired, wait 10 minutes and go at it again. 8. The uglier you look, the easier it is to get some. 7. You don’t have to compliment the person who gave you candy. 6. The person you’re with doesn’t fantasize you’re someone else. 5. If you get a stomach ache, it won’t last 9 months. 4. If you wear your Batman mask, no one... Read Full Story

I have had a few instances in my life where I have heard that phrase – ‘Bloody Men!’.  The first time I can remember it was when I was a little lass and there I was amongst these big strapping older ladies.  Terrifying they were and frankly not very nice either.  Bullies really. I was working…, well you dont need to know where I was working but anyway, this one lady in particular kept saying that ‘Bloody men’ as though all the ills in the world fell squarel... Read Full Story

I just had the most fantastic weekend, thank you for the delightful company and the best sunday ever,  Mister x  It got me thinking about doing great things and really living life.  You have to, dont you? I got sent this today as well, and as I havent put one on for a while, I think its time to have a deep and meaningful… “You’ll seldom experience regret for anything that you’ve done. It is what you haven’t done that will torment you. The message, therefore, is c... Read Full Story

Oh dont stop me, I am getting very excited!   Here’s how it goes. Dreams of twinkly lights and frosty mornings (we dont spend too long being frosty of course:)  roaring fires and Christmas hampers.  Roast goose with all the trimmings.  Real Christmas trees and mulled wine.  Pulling a cracker (please see my availability below :) Oh and singing and being merry and having a kiss under the mistletoe and being all sentimental and really embracing life and  just enjoying it all, commercialise... Read Full Story

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Hmm, to some it means running away.  Not to me though.  It means taking yourself out of your normal routine and doing something relaxing, something to take your mind off things that normally occupy your mind.  Some chaps have been known to cite me as escapism, well the time spent with me anyway.  I have also been called ‘A quality product’ which I quite liked hehe. My escapism though,  for now, is cooking.  I did that cookery course, you know;  the one I told you about, with a top... Read Full Story

Very important research :) has determined that ladies who exercise their pelvic floor muscles have more frequent and better orgasms than those who dont. Three things you probably didn’t know about orgasms in women 1. Some sources say 90% of women have never had a vaginal orgasm during intercourse. In the 2008 Orgasm Survey nearly half of women said they rarely or never have orgasms. Two thirds of women who rate their pelvic floor as ‘poor’ have never had an orgasm. Those who... Read Full Story

Apparently we may be experiencing some postal strike action from 22 October.  What joy.  May I remind the lovely gents booked for dinners or lunches that deposits should be sent sooner rather than later?, oh and let me know when you have sent it darling; I  then have an excuse to drive out to the post depot and spank those naughty posties’  bottoms :)   Thank you! x Tweet This Post Read Full Story