Happy Halloween!

Top 10 Reasons Why Trick-or-Treating Is Better Than Sex

10. You’re guaranteed to get at least a little something in the sack.

9. If you get tired, wait 10 minutes and go at it again.

8. The uglier you look, the easier it is to get some.

7. You don’t have to compliment the person who gave you candy.

6. The person you’re with doesn’t fantasize you’re someone else.

5. If you get a stomach ache, it won’t last 9 months.

4. If you wear your Batman mask, no one thinks you’re kinky.

3. It doesn’t matter if kids hear you moaning and groaning.

2. You have less guilt the next morning.

1. IF YOU DON’T GET WHAT YOU WANT, YOU CAN ALWAYS GO NEXT DOOR!

Oh and for anoraks like me….   Samhain – the traditional way (Wicca). This is the way we used to celebrate the 31st October.  Some things to do….

1. Carve a pumpkin. Most people think that pumpkins are carved into jack-o-lanterns at Halloween to create a spooky centerpiece, but the carving of pumpkins traces back to the Wiccan tradition of using this seasonal gourd to symbolize the dual god and goddess that Wiccans worship. When picking up pumpkins for kids or neighbors, buy one for yourself and carve it with a moon or sun to represent the deities. Toast and eat the seeds in appreciation of the fruits of the season.
2. Step 2

   Light a candle. Samhain is a time to remember those who have been lost over the past year and to acknowledge that they are still with us in spirit. Light a candle and place it in a window (one that is free of drapes, curtains or other flammable materials) to help light the way for the spirits of those who have passed away.

3. Step 3

   Pick some apples. Apples are a traditional fruit of the autumn season, but they actually play key roles in multiple Samhain rituals. Make a dish with fruits of the seasons like apples or pomegranates to celebrate the bounty of the earth. Bury the seeds afterwards to usher in new growth for the next year’s harvest. Cut an apple in half, place five bay leaves in the center in the shape of a star, and bind the halves back together with black or red ribbon. Bless the offering in a traditional Samhain ritual and bury it afterwards as a symbol of love for the God and Goddess.

4. Step 4

   Leave food for the departed. Most of us only think to leave plates of food out at night when we are expecting someone jolly and bearing gifts, but the tradition is really rooted in Wiccan tradition intended to honor the dead and help them depart the land of the living peacefully. Leave a plate of food in the window where you place your candle and think of any loved ones you have lost over the past year as you do so. Choose foods of the season such as corn, nuts, gingerbread, seasonal fruits and vegetables and cider or, if you are making the offering in remembrance of a specific loved one, leave foods that were their favorites.

5. Step 5

   Light a fire. Bonfires are great for keeping away the chill of a crisp early autumn evening, but they are also symbolic during Samhain. After lighting your bonfire take a moment to write down any aspect of your life that you want to get rid of; it can be a part of your personality, something that has been causing you unnecessary stress or worry or a negative situation that has left you with feelings of anger, worry or regret. Focus on why you feel you need to be rid of this thing and how doing so will better your life. Cast the paper into the bonfire and watch it burn. As you do, imagine that negative aspect disappearing with the ashes of the bonfire and let it go.

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