The Chain E-Mails We Get - Articles - Zimbio

Bill Cosby E-mail: It's About Behavior Not Color

Tue, 21 May 2008 17:51:41 GMT

posted by
Here's one of those e-mails that get circulated around that people like me love to see. I like Bill Cosby. And it's really disgusting to see that he takes so much heat from the black populace for saying what should have been done/said in the first place.
HERE, is the Snopes.com link for it. The e-mail is as follows;
They're standing on the corner and they can't speak English. I can't even talk the way these people talk:
Why you ain't,
Where you is,
What he drive,
Where he stay,
Where he work,
Who you be...

And I blamed the kid until I heard the mother talk. And then I heard the father talk.

Everybody knows it's important to speak English except these knuckleheads. You can't be a doctor with that kind of crap coming out of your mouth. In fact you will never get any kind of job making a decent living. People marched and were hit in the face with rocks to get an education, and now we've got these knuckleheads walking around.

The lower economic people are not holding up their end in this deal.

These people are not parenting. They are buying things for kids. $500 sneakers? For what? And they won't spend $200 for Hooked on Phonics. I am talking about these people who cry when their son is standing there in an orange suit.

Where were you when he was 2??
Where were you when he was 12??
Where were you when he was 18 and how come you didn't know that he had a pistol??

And where is the father?? Or who is his father?

People putting their clothes on backward: Isn't that a sign of something gone wrong? People with their hats on backward, pants down around the crack, isn't that a sign of something? Or are you waiting for Jesus to pull his pants up?

Isn't it a sign of something when she has her dress all the way up and got all type of needles [piercing] going through her body? What part of Africa did this come from?? We are not Africans. Those people are not Africans; they don't know a thing about Africa. With names like Shaniqua, Taliqua and Mohammed and all of that crap, and all of them are in jail.

Brown or black versus the Board of Education is no longer the white person's problem. We have got to take the neighborhood back.

People used to be ashamed. Today a woman has eight children with eight different 'husbands' or men or whatever you call them now. We have millionaire football players who cannot read. We have million-dollar basketball players who can't write two paragraphs. We, as black folks have to do a better job. Someone working at Wal-Mart with seven kids, you are hurting us.

We have to start holding each other to a higher standard. We cannot blame the white people any longer.

It's NOT about color... It's about behavior!!!

Well said Mr. Cosby. Well said. Now if people would just honestly listen.

http://hoopyfrooddude.blogspot.com/2008/05/bill-cosby-e-mail-its-about-behavior.html

Welcome to our wikizine called "The Chain E-Mails We Get"

Wed, 5 Jul 2007 21:32:30 GMT

posted by
Wikizines are interactive magazines that anyone can create or edit - and this one is called "The Chain E-Mails We Get". Here you can find fresh voices and respond in real time. Some members write articles about recent news and trends related to the wikizine's topic, others recount relevant personal stories or share their favorite pictures and video clips. Got an interesting idea or story to share with other members of this wikizine? Well, then put on your journalist's cap and add your own article!

Price Per Gallon: A Moment Of Liquid Humor

Sat, 30 Mar 2008 01:04:18 GMT

posted by
We all need a moment of humor to reflect upon every once in a while. Some of you have already seen this. I myself, just got it today from a co-worker. It's a humorous view of the prices we pay per gallon for various liquids. So the next time your at the fuel pump griping about the cost of gas, think of it this way;

And remember, all these examples do NOT imply that gasoline is cheap; it just illustrates how outrageous some prices are.... when Compared with Gasoline......

Diet Snapple 16 oz $1.29 ... $10.32 per gallon.

Lipton Ice Tea 16 oz $1.19 ... $9.52 per gallon.

Gatorade 20 oz $1.59 ... $10.17 per gallon.

Ocean Spray 16 oz $1.25 ... $10.00 per gallon.

Brake Fluid 12 oz $3.15 ... $33.60 per gallon.

Vick's Nyquil 6 oz $8.35 ... $178.13 per gallon.

Pepto Bismol 4 oz $3.85 ... $123.20 per gallon.

Whiteout 7 oz $1.39 ... $25.42 per gallon.

Scope 1.5 oz $0.99 ... $84.48 per gallon.

And here, this is the REAL KICKER...

Evian water 9 oz $1.49..........$21.19 per gallon! $21.19 for WATER!!!! And the buyers don't even know the source. But then, Evian spelled backwards is NAIVE. Go figure.

And here's one last one to really get your shorts in a bind.

Printer Ink......... $5,200 a gal. (five thousand two hundred dollars). No wonder printers have gotten so cheap. They kill you with the ink costs!

So, the next time you're at the pump, be glad your car doesn't run on water, Scope, Whiteout, Pepto Bismol, Nyquil or, heaven forbid, Printer Ink!!!!!

Have a nice day now. 8^)

http://hoopyfrooddude.blogspot.com/2008/03/price-per-gallon-moment-of-liquid-humor.html

2008 Democratic National Convention: Schedule Of Events

Sun, 3 Sep 2007 19:57:32 GMT

posted by
A co-worker of mine forwarded this e-mail to me today. After getting a pretty good laugh out of it, I realized just how accurate this is.

So without any further delay, I present to you, the 2008 Democratic National Convention's Schedule of Events;

7:00 pm ~ Opening flag burning, (U.S., U.K. and Israeli flags will be in attendance.)
7:15 pm ~ Pledge of Allegiance to the U. N. and the future "One World Government."
7:20 pm ~ Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
7:25 pm ~ Nonreligious prayer and worship with Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton. Back-up chants provided by the local Wiccan Organization.
7:45 pm ~ Ceremonial tree hugging. A fake Oak tree will be provided.
7:55 pm ~ Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
8:00 pm ~ A Speech given by Al Gore on "How I Invented the Internet." Expecting a possible run-over as the Goracle is expected to blend this with Global Warming.
8:15 pm ~ Gay Wedding Planning, Barney Frank presiding.
8:35 pm ~ Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
8:40 pm ~ "Our Troops are War Criminals," speech given by John Kerry and Jane Fonda.
9.00 pm ~ Memorial service for Saddam and his sons - Cindy Sheehan and Susan Sarandon will deliver the eulogies of these Heroic figures.
9:50 pm ~ Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
10:00 pm ~ 'Answering Machine Etiquette' by residing expert, Alec Baldwin.
10:20 pm ~ The New "Drive Thru Abortion Express Lanes," being installed at Planned Parenthood franchises across the nation. Cecile Richards speaking.
11:00 pm ~ Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
11:05 pm ~ Collection for the Osama Bin Laden kidney transplant fund to be sponsored by Barbara Streisand.
11:15 pm ~ "Free the Freedom Fighters from Guantanamo Bay" announcement by Sean Penn.
11:30 pm ~ "Oval Office Affairs. The proper use of cigars," brought to you by William Jefferson Clinton.
11:45 pm ~ Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
11:50 pm ~ "How George Bush Brought Down the World Trade Towers," by Howard Dean and Rosie O'Donnell. Dean will perform his trademark scream for the crowd.
12:15 am ~ 'Truth in Broadcasting Award' - Presented to Sir Dan Rather by Michael Moore will be simulcast from the Magical, Mystical World of Journalistic Knights.
12:25 am ~ Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
12:30 am ~ Satellite address by Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. Mahmoud will briefly discuss the dhimmitudal role of the great satan.
12:45 am ~ Nomination of Hillary Rodham Clinton by Nancy Pelosi. Address will be fed live via satellite from Syrian President Assad's hot tub.
1:00 am ~ Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
1:05 am ~ Coronation of Hillary Rodham Clinton.
1:30 am ~ Ted Kennedy proposes a toast.
1:35 am ~ Bill Clinton asks Ted Kennedy to drive Hillary home. Billy reminds him to use the route through Chappaquiddick.

Hope you enjoyed this as much as I did.

A Not-So-Nice Letter To The NAACP About Michael Vick

Mon, 9 Oct 2007 22:00:00 GMT

posted by
Here is yet another GREAT e-mail I had received as a Forward that's both humorous, and makes a hell of a point in the process. Even if it turns out not to be real, you can't argue the truth towards the topic at hand in this E-mail.

Props again to my friend Roberta for forwarding this message to me.

Here's the E-mails full text. WARNING! This E-mail DOES contain some foul Language:

This was written to the head of the NAACP in Atlanta on the Michael Vick affair.

I love it when a white guy can gently yet logically put things into perspective.

Saturday, August 18, 2007 An Open Letter to the Atlanta Chapter of the NAACP.

Dear Dr. R L White, Head of the Atlanta Chapter of the NAACP,

My name is Mike. I am 27, and I am neither a member of your organization nor a resident of Atlanta. Normally I wouldn't bother you, but then I came across this article, and it compelled me to write.

Since I am white, I am going to tread carefully, so as not to offend your gentle sensibilities. But, Dr. White, you are a dumb fuck. Speaking for white people everywhere, let me fill you in on something. This case was not a race issue. It was about killing dogs. And if there is one thing people don't stand for, regardless of race, it's killing dogs. You compared it to deer hunting. Again, Dr. White, you are a dumb fuck. When was the last time a deer greeted you at the door when you got home from work? Or curled up next to you and gently nuzzled in to take a nap? Dogs are pets, you moron. They aren't meant to be killed for sport. The failure to make this distinction only makes you look more stupid.

Sorry, I lost my temper there. Here's the thing, Dr. White. The reason people were outraged by this was because he killed dogs. If Ben Roethlisberger or Brett Favre had done it, the reaction would have been the same, I guarantee you. The difference is, had Ben Roethlisberger or Brett Favre done this, you wouldn't see white supporters rallying behind them, proclaiming he was innocent in the face of mountains of damning evidence, supporting him regardless of the outcome. Let me let you in on a secret about white people; when one of our own makes us look bad, we condemn him and disown them. I suggest you adopt a similar policy. If your group's mission is truly to advance "colored" people (your word, not mine) you'd disassociate from the idiots in your race. It can't go wrong, trust me.

Anyway, Dr. White, I don't want this to come off as racist, because it isn't. Michael Vick is a despicable person who happens to be black. The sooner you realize that, the less of a dumb fuck you'll look like.

Sincerely,
Mike

You can not get any more accurate or to the point on this whole race issue than this! One can only hope they will take the hint and "dis-own" Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton, then perhaps they can get ahead of the whole 'Victim Mentality' issue.