i love grape drink - Articles - Zimbio

DubMonkey Greetings: Happy Birthday!

Wed, 13 Mar 2008 17:06:00 GMT

posted by jchamber1
What woman won't melt over such a displayed sensitivity and understanding of phrases that a lady wants to hear?...

...apparently all of them according to SheWhoseNameMayNotBeSpoken. How could all Rap musicians have gotten this one wrong, they love bitches! I'm so disillusioned now...

DubMonkey Greetings: Wish you were here! (6)

Sat, 23 Mar 2008 01:24:00 GMT

posted by jchamber1
Is there anybody out there?

We don't need no education
We don't need no thought control ...

We just need some blog readers!

Please become President so our hand shake holds more value.

Tue, 21 May 2008 16:37:00 GMT

posted by jchamber1

ILDGers, Here is the phot I snapped of Mr. B. Obama last Saturday in Keizer, Oregon. He appeared at the Iris Festival (it is as boring as it sounds) for an impromptu meet & greet with some yokels. At the time of his appearance there was only about 150 people at the fair, the rest having succumbed to the +100 degree weather (hot for Oregonians, back off). I was able to snap this photo with my camera phone just a few feet away from the Senator. This is actually the second pic I took. The first one was at a greater distance and the lighting wasn't good so it looked like I was taking pictures of random African American men (that is Kaiser's territory), so I repositioned and voila! After the photo was taken I noticed that he was right in front of me so I reached out my hand and said, "Hello Senator." He looked at me, smiled, said 'Hello' back and shook my hand. Best Case Scenario: If the U.S, smells what Barack is cooking and he wins the Presidency, I will have a story (boring to everyone but me, but still) of having shook the hand of the President of the U.S.A. Worst Case Scenario: If he loses I shook hands with a Senator, which is still kind of cool cause he is pretty much a celebrity (a Barack star, if you will). And he has shook hands with Oprah, so I have a story for all the domestic engineers out there- I met BaRACK OBAMMAAAA!!! (must be said in Oprah's scary lilt as she gives away swag to her crazed audience). -te

The Special Ed helmet award goes to... Tangerine Elephant

Tue, 9 Apr 2008 20:36:00 GMT

posted by jchamber1
So I was picking up some paint for a friend (while there doing other shopping)and was given the paint sample for reference (Color: Earthy Finish: Eggshell). I picked up all the stuff I was there for and headed to the paint section. Once there I spent a good 10 minutes looking for this "Earthy" color of paint with no luck, as the entire aisle held only white paint. I looked around the adjoining aisles for the colored paint and found none.

Frustrated and hot (Because of the coat I was wearing you pervs...I don't know why I wear my coat into the store, I always end up getting hot and wishing I'd left the damn thing in the car.)
I finally flagged down an employee for assistance and asked him where the colored paint was. The look on his face and the smile in his voice (knowing he struck moron gold with me today) hit me at the same time as he informed me that the color has to be mixed in to the white base. Then of course I remembered having to do that when I painted my room 3-4 yrs ago. But, of course it was too late...too late to have used a foreign accent to disguise my ignorance...too late to play it off like a joke ("Ha Ha, I asked the guy at Home Depot where the colored paint was and he went looking for it...idiot"). My only saving grace was not dragging 30 items into the 10 or under line like a one inlimbo did just last night. :)

- TE (wearing my new helmet while they xray me to see if i am fully 'tarded)

IKEA: GENIUS MARKETING

Tue, 2 Jul 2008 16:59:00 GMT

posted by jchamber1
So IKEA is known for it's stylish furniture and delicious meatballs but...they do ad's pretty well too...

If monkeysuncle needs this one explained, ManicEeyore, please tell him what the "Rocket Ship" is and that they don't gain value over time if he saves them "New in box".

And Another

And yet another