'So Your Son Is a Centaur' Is the Fake Self-Help Book You Didn't Know You Needed
"Has a sorcerer turned your son into a centaur?"
Coping with children's life choices is hard. Coping with sorcerers turning your human children into hairy (more hairy?) part-horse creatures is even harder.
That's where Dr. Pinder Chipps comes in — or, more accurately, prankster wizard Jeff Wysaki. The enterprising genius created fake dust jackets for a brilliant and, frankly, necessary self-help book entitled So Your Son is a Centaur. He then planted them all over his local bookstore.
And Wysaki's Dr. Chipps knows his stuff. Not only is he the proud father of two centaurs, Fabian and Quintz, he also received his Ph.D in Pyschology from "a hobo who was selling false documents out of the trunk of a car."
The dust jacket includes enticing promises for the non-existent self-help manual. Readers can learn the truths of the centaur culture, how to love unconditionally, what the Bible REALLY says about centaurs, and, perhaps most importantly, the futility of asking centaur children to wear pants.
Unfortunately, it's not clear if Dr. Chipps actually believes being a centaur is a choice (a child's decision vs. a sorcerer's magic?), but we're confident the imaginary book would cover this issue more satisfactorily than the dust jacket.
Which brings us to the only real point any article about So Your Son Is a Centaur should come to: Get Wysaki's Dr. Chipps a book deal already, publishers! If nothing else, do it for Fabian and Quintz. After all, apples cost money.
Jeff Wysaki has made more parody self-help books! (We're particularly partial to The Beginner's Guide to Human Sacrifice: A Step-by-Step Guide to Satanic Death Rituals.) Check them all out on his tumblr!