'Pretty Little Liars' 5.22 Recap: OrAnge Is The New Ali

'Pretty Little Liars' 5.22 Recap: OrAnge Is The New Ali
(ABC Family)As we inch ever closer to the PLL season 5 finale, things are certainly heating up in Rosewood — and in London, at least this week. So what’s up with our favorite liars this week? Let’s check in.

Jess: We open this week on Ali (still in jail) and her tete-a-tete with her lawyer, who reiterates, and claims that Mrs. Hastings agrees, that Alison should not take the stand at her trial. Cyrus can’t be her alibi because she’d have to admit that she lied about him kidnapping her, and no jury will look kindly on that. Ali almost names Mike, but her lawyer stops her with news of a plea bargain from the DA — fifteen years if Ali pleads guilty and names her accomplice. Who do the police think helped her kill MonA? Hanna, of course. Because there were remains in that barrel (though they were “too small to obtain DNA”) and #BadCop saw Hanna at the unit the day she and Toby found it. So the question of the episode becomes: will Ali take the plea??? 

'Pretty Little Liars' 5.22 Recap: OrAnge Is The New Ali
Melissa and Spencer are sharing a sisterly moment in London, mostly with Melissa telling Spencer what to do and Spencer saying “no.” But, that’s their relationship. Spencer tells Melissa all about Toby becoming a cop to protect her, and Melissa says how great it is to be able to make a fresh start in a new place. Let’s all move to London, Melissa! It seems to solve all problems. They share some more moments later on, too, chatting about borrowing clothes and sharing makeup tips and agreeing to “start over.” We’ll see how long that lasts. The answer? Not long. As soon as Hanna gets arrested, Spencer tries to get back on a plane, telling Melissa to cancel her St. Andrews interview. Melissa reveals that it was all a ruse between Veronica and her to keep Spencer in London: There is no interview. Obvs, Spencer is unhappy. Also in London, Spencer and British Colin are getting cozy. He takes her to a play, she pays for their pints, and they smooch. He implores her to stay in London, but why would you? It’s always raining.

Jess: And while Spencer kisses her second #NotToby guy of the past few weeks, Em is fixated on Aria’s ex. Em’s convinced that EzrA may have come across the name “Varjak” in his “research for his book” (aka STALKING), but he says he didn’t. Ali, by the way, claims that the “Holly Varjak” passport and other items the liArs found in her attic when on MonA’s posthumous scavenger hunt were planted — by A or MonA, who knows. EzrA, for his part, doesn’t seem to think it’s weird that Em is asking him questions instead of Aria (who’s concentrating on her test and/or Andrew’s lips), and he wants to follow his nose to MonA’s lawyer. He pretends to want to franchise the Bookshoppe, but really asks questions about who really hired this guy to deliver “MonA’s” goods to the liArs. The lawyer’s dodgy, so Em, EZ, and a last-minute addition Aria follow him (meanwhile, Aria gets a text from Andrew and EzrA’s all like, #WhosAndrew...and yeah, I laughed). When Em chases the #NotAnEstateLawyer lawyer guy into a weird house, Aria ditches EzrA and his incessant questions right quick. You go, girl. While they go their separate ways in the woods, Em does the real spy work and peeps #NotAnEstateLawyer unloading a safe, and a delivery pizza receipt with Varjak’s name and number on it. So Varjak is A or working for A. Em calls the digits later, but we don’t get to hear who’s on the other end.
'Pretty Little Liars' 5.22 Recap: OrAnge Is The New Ali
Hanna’s certainly got a problem — Veronica Hastings and Ashley Marin have a chat (that Hanna eavesdrops on, obviously) and Veronica tells Ashley that Ali is super close to taking that plea deal. Yeah, that’s right. Get the mamas involved. The liars know about this, too, and Hanna is just increasingly turning shades of ghostly as these conversations progress. Luckily, Mama Marin plucks her from Caleb’s with that look that only a mom could give: You need to go home, Hanna. Ashley takes her home and Hanna spills the whole thing, and Hanna’s all “I didn’t want to drag you into this mess.” Hanna, this is a murder investigation, not shoplifting sunglasses again. (Jess note: props to Hanna for finally telling the truth to an adult!)

Jess: Also, prison is not a fun place to be, Han. As evidenced by Ali’s saga behind bars this week. Her fellow inmates give her dirty looks all episode, and Ali finds her cell trashed right before the routine inspection. She’s also locked and terrorized in the laundry room. She’s terrified enough to call her lawyer and ask to take the deal. When Mrs. Hastings comes to visit her and ask “WTFIU,” Ali asks tough but Mrs. H sees the iron wounds on her arm and coaxes some feeling out of Ali by dropping this truth-bomb: “If Hanna is innocent and you name her as your accomplice, you’ll have to live with that terrible lie for the rest of your life.” MMM I’m not sure that’s enough to convince Alison, since she’s like, a terrible person, but nice try Mrs. Hastings. A for effort (get it?). When Caleb shows up at Hanna’s to warn her that Toby told him a judge issued a warrant for her arrest, Hanna FREAKS (duh) and Caleb tries to convince her to tell #BadCop...everything. Ever. But the liArs are scared of the truth! They’re liArs! Come on, Caleb, you know that. Still, he convinces her — since she has the A threats as proof on her phone — but of course the second she walks into the RPD, A hacks her phone and erases ev-er-y-thing. So she’s arrested. And it’s not because Ali named her in the plea (which Ali hasn’t taken by the episode’s end). It’s because #BadCop found MonA’s death shroud, and Hanna’s blood was on the clothing. But Hanna doesn’t know that, so she throws some major shade Ali’s way when she arrives in jail...right before Ali rejects the plea deal.

'Pretty Little Liars' 5.22 Recap: OrAnge Is The New AliPretty Little Extras:
  • Um, I know London apartments, and that is like, the biggest London apartment I’ve ever seen. What do these people do?
  • Of course Spencer’s had a bucket list since she was six. And of course Hamlet is her favorite play.
  • “That was my first time buying beer legally!” OMG that’s the most high school Spencer has ever sounded. And Colin the Brit creeps on her right after she says it. He’ll fit in with the guys on this show juuust fine.
  • The Pretty Little Liars writers are making Colin as English as they possibly can: “jumper,” “rubbish,” “pints.” We know. We get it. You’re a Brit.
  • Of course Mel and Mama Hastings lied to Spencer to keep her in London. Lying is the Hastings way!
  • Heck yes to Aria owning up to EzrA about her recent avoidance of him and her newfound desire to DUMP HIS BUTT. Yeah, I said “butt.” Whatever. #EndOfEzria
  • EzrA’s hair looks serial killer-ish this episode. In fact, everything does: his face, his clothes, his demeanor. THAT’S BECAUSE HE IS.

Next week, it looks like Hanna lets prison get her down, Ali’s trial begins, and the liArs work overtime to “think like MonA” and figure out WTF is going on (once and for all? Doubt it). Also, apparently Ali and A have been chatting on the prison phone — for funsies?! Only time will tell. So leave your thoughts in the comments and we’ll see you next week as we continue to count down to the #BigAReveal!