Selena Gomez's 'Stars Dance' Gets Bad Reviews – Read the Critics' Funniest Lines
(Hollywood Records)No one was expecting Selena Gomez to reinvent the wheel with her latest album, Stars Dance.
Musically, Gomez has made no attempt to present herself as anything other than a particularly shiny manufactured pop artist, relying on a huge team of the buzziest songwriters and producers in the pursuit of Top 40 glory. This is, of course, fairly typical in the sphere in which she operates, but even so, the critics haven't been won over by her latest release.
Reviews for Stars Dance, her fourth full-length album and her first without her old band, The Scene, have been lukewarm at best. But on the bright side, some critics got really creative with their skewers! Check out the best of the bad reviews below.
Los Angeles Times (2 and a half stars)
"Gomez is a resolutely average vocalist, but Stars Dance is like getting a piña colada the size of a basketball chucked at your head from a St. Petersburg hotel balcony."
NY Daily News (3 out of 5 stars)
"It helps that Gomez boasts a far richer voice than her idols, Britney, J.Lo and Janet. Then again, so does a chipmunk."
The Independent (1 out of 5 stars)
"Consisting of standard, supermarket-own-brand, sub-Britney sexpop, this album has been given to her to wear, just like a stylist giving her an outfit for a photo shoot."
Rolling Stone (3 out of 5 stars)
"All work and no public meltdowns make Selena a dull girl."
Billboard (78 out of 100)
"After a while, Stars Dance begins to sound like an exceptionally produced Disney workout playlist."
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