The Very Small Colombian Baseball Community of Edgar Renteria And Orlando Cabrera Hate Each Other's Guts

One of our favorite Simpsons is the Frank Grimes episode where the poor guy just can't catch a break, even at his own funeral. That's what immediately popped into our head when we finished this article about warring MLB shortstops Edgar Renteria And Orlando Cabrera who both have two things in common--they're from Colombia and they hate each other's guts. Most of the hate, according to the piece, goes from Cabrera (Grimes) to Renteria (Homer) because of Edgar's greater fame back home. It's gotten to the point where even the kids are suffering because Cabrera's buying the baseball academies from Renteria to sabotage them. Won't someone please think of the children?!?

"He wanted to buy one team so he could wreck everything that's been done with the league," Edgar says. "I think he did it out of malice. You should ask him what he has against the Renteras. For several years, people have told me that he's jealous of me. People have always known me more in Colombia than him, and I think that bothers him."

Yeah, that and getting treated like a complete Grimessian asshole.

A few years ago, Cabrera flew home to Colombia to take care of some personal business during the break. At the airport, he was harassed by a customs agent who demanded to know why he'd come all that way for such a short stay. Cabrera explained that he was a professional ballplayer. "I've never heard of you," the guard said. "The only Colombian baseball player I know is Edgar Rentera."

We think Orlando Cabrera is the biggest man in the universe for not taking a knife and turning that guard into swiss cheese. Where would he have gotten a knife so quickly? He was in Colombia--it's easier than you think. NOW IT'S PERSONAL [ESPN] Image [ESPN]