Afghans Citizens Killed in "Huge Mistake"

The seeming stalemate that is the Afghan War took another, miserable, turn yesterday when two 500 pound bombs were dropped on two fuel tankers absconded by the Taliban. Satellite images showed scores of what appeared to be Taliban fighters surrounding the truck as they were attempting to extricate it from mud, in which the two trucks had become ensnared.

The attack on the trucks was partially carried out on the advice of a single individual near the scene who insisted that all of the individuals surrounding the trucks at the time were Taliban fighters. This information could not be corroborated by satellite whose images could not verify with complete accuracy whether those present were fighters or villagers. Satellite images also could not completely ascertain whether the person who had supplied the information to Western military forces was in fact, drunk, with an alcohol level 4 times over the driving limit.

"It's good equipment," cited Col. Harold Mendendorf of U.S. forces in the area, "but it's not THAT good." "It's war. Civilian casualties are inevitable. What do you want? A sign on every insurgent's back that says 'Hey Dude. I'm Taliban!' Shoot my ass!"

The decision to bomb the trucks, which resulted in nearly 125 or more civilian casualties is being investigated and has been officially classified as a huge mistake.