Researchers claim women over thirty might as well OD on heroin

(Give it up, love: You’re well past it…)

Today’s broadcast is sponsored by hair colour brand Clairol Perfect 10, which is running a new campaign, with the somewhat surprising and more than a bit dubious slogan, ‘Over the hill and far away.’

Anyway, as I’ve stated a few times before, I like scientists. Not just the humble white coats who merely slog on, in pursuit of a better type of throw-away pen, a more convincing-looking toupee or a cure for AIDS but also - and maybe especially - the kind of scientist that has his or her eyes firmly on tomorrow’s headlines, like a heat-seeking missile in, well, in heat, I suppose.

Of course, the downside of trying to make the news with such religious fervour is that, occasionally, it makes you look like an utter prat:

“Researchers discovered women feel most confident and happy with their love life and body shape shortly before they reach 30. It is also the period in their life when they enjoy the best sex – but the happiness is relatively shortlived. Because by the time they have turned 30 they start worrying about growing old and developing grey hair and wrinkles.”

Yes, that great time just before you hit thirty. When everything is going ever so well for you…

Just ask Janis Joplin…

(Get it while you can, indeed…)